This week truly been an eye opening experience. Christ is so...Ah! Well I guess I should first explain what this new blog is all about and why I feel the need to document this season of my life. So I just got off of a fast yesterday. Five days, no food, not much water. Please hold your applause or accolades if you think any of that came from me. Fasting isn't something new to me, I've done many variations of it to seek the closeness of Christ in my life, and each any every time (if its done right) I come out of it filled with completeness and specific directions of where God wants to take me next in life. Here are some things I learned about myself and God during this past week:
- True Faith - how to have it; it's meaning; why we need it
- How to get answered prayers.
- How to control hunger/gluttonous eating habits.
- The importance of self discipline.
- I desire to first be a vegetarian then eventual vegan. (Basically, an all plant based food diet.)
- I desire to go natural. (No more perms)
- How to trust God.
Even now, looking at some things on that list is completely astonishing to me. If you would've told me a week ago that I would decide to turn natural and become a vegetarian I'd probably think you were out of your mind. But, then again, I know how real Christ is in my life and if He says go, then I'll go. So those are some of the new changes I'm about to make in my life but to be honest, this whole semester of schooling or past four months has truly been a season of rebirth. God has stripped me of everything I ever put my hope and trust in that wasn't Him and made it so that He was my one and only source of completeness. I'll be honest and admit that it was painful at first and still is. At times I still find myself clutching, grabbing, fighting to hold on to the things He desperately wants me to let go of so I can be filled with Him. I know its all for the better good, but even when you know who and Whose you are, you still have the tendency to want to slide back into old ways. Anyway, this new blog site and new series of blogs that I will write is dedicated to my journey to becoming a TRUE woman after God's own heart. Why is the word TRUE capitalized in the previous sentence? Was I not previously (before a week ago) a woman after God's own heart? The word true is capitalized because I'm tired of this...roller coaster. Sometimes I feel like I have one foot in the world and one foot in the Kingdom. I know this walking with Christ thing is an all-or-nothing type of deal and I want to give Him my all. I want to use this blog to document my progress and as a source of accountability. Even though I don't have many readers (or any for that matter) I know it will be encouraging to me to report my successes, mishaps, and discoveries to a place that I can call my own (this blog). I'm excited about documenting my journey to becoming a vegetarian and growing and accepting my natural hair. (Wow, even typing that last part about the natural hair felt weird.)
Aside from all of the specifics of the new journey I'm embarking on, the main goal of me documenting everything, and the whole accountability of this blog is my desire to be the absolute best representation of Christ I can be. As a single woman, and even when I'm eventually married, Christ is and always will be my bridegroom. In other words, I am, and always will be (even when I have a earthy husband) married to Christ first and forever more. Proverbs 12:4 says "A wife of noble character is her husbands crown". So since Christ is my bridegroom, and I'm His wife (Not only me, all believers. Christians are the Church that God died for. We are the bride of Christ. Source: Holy Bible, New Testament) I am the Crown of Christ. Therefore, I desire to be the best crown there is. I do not need to be a dusty crown, a lazy crown, a useless crown that does not shine and lacks luster. No, my ultimate desire is for people to look at me and see Christ. In that case, I need to look good meaning my appearance needs to be in check. A person's first impressions are appearances. Judging someone off of their appearance by first impression is not shallow its just truth. Before you get to know a person all you have to judge is their appearance. So in that case, I want to compliment Christ with my appearance. Before I even get a chance to open my mouth to say a word I want people to have an idea of who my God is. Secondly, I need to be healthy. Now, me seeking health is not something new. The year of 2012 has truly yielded growth in this area of my life. In this year alone I've completed my first triathlon, ran in my first half marathon, and started my own health and fitness ministry, Kingdom Fitness. To complete those athletic feats I've had no choice but to adopt a healthier diet. However, that isn't enough. I think one of the main goals of life should be to continually seek improvement. Meaning, whatever you do or whatever you've done, you will never "arrive". Basically, you can always do more. You can always do better, and that's what I'm seeking. My eating habits have improved substantially from what they were a year ago and even more so two years ago but I'm ready to take it to another level. I'm seeking to be the best crown, best representation of Christ that I can be. Your health is something of extreme importance in your walk of salvation. How do you expect to tell people of God's goodness if you're broken down, sick, and overweight? Or you may not even be to that point yet, still young and invincible. Your food intake determines your productivity. Food is to be enjoyed, as are all of God's precious gifts, but its main purpose is to be our fuel. The more fried, sugary, unhealthy foods you stuff yourself with the more unproductive you will be. I've had it argued to me that that point isn't true because overweight people get stuff done all the time just fine. True, but there is a distinct difference in the amount of energy you'll have throughout the day if your choice breakfast is a bowl of whole grain serial served with almond milk, peanut butter and honey (all natural) toast along with fresh fruit in comparison to a couple of doughnuts, eggs, and bacon. The simple carbs in the doughnuts will slow you down and make you more unproductive. Even if you finish all of the tasks at hand, so much energy could've been saved if you'd made the healthier choice to start your day. I could go on health tangents all day, which is not the intent of this particular blog, so if any of the past 3 sentences caught your attention, visit kingdomfitnessnow.com. My vegetarian interests have sparked from a good friend of mine telling me about a film "Forks over Knives" and his eventual plans of becoming totally plant based by next summer. After watching the film its not much of a surprise to me that I've decided to embark on the same journey since we are the same type of people and share alot of the same interests. Finally, the natural hair desire has come from a long buried conviction of not accepting my hair as God made and intended it to be. I grew up with getting my hair pressed and curled. I did not get my first perm until my 7th grade year of school and didn't start getting regular perms until high school. I died to get a perm but soon realized that there wasn't much hype to it. From then on up until about a month ago I've gotten perms and had relaxed hair. The deeper I got into my relationship with Christ I began to realize how disrespectful it is to Him. Its as if black women have told God "look we know you created us, but you didn't do it right so we gotta fix it". And when I started looking at it from that point of view it always kinda tugged at my heart. I've always been into R&B and my African American culture so I've come across the "I am not my hair" movements and read about permed hair being black women's way of conforming to the white mans standard of beauty. To all of those arguments and viewpoints, I could not object. However, I just didn't care enough about conforming to go natural because I'm a person of convenience and perms are convenient for me. I'm an extremely impatient person. Goin natural? "Ain't nobody got time fo dat!" But here I am, going natural. I just hate I took so long to arrive to this conclusion since my past 2.5 years of college have yielded major hair growth (past my shoulders, right above the middle of my back) It sucks to think of having to cut it all off but I know I will be happier with the finished natural, thicker hair product. I don't think it'll be that difficult either to be honest. I wear weave during the semesters and let my hair "rest" during Christmas and summer breaks(that's how my hair has gotten so long these past years). My plan has always been to wear weave during college and by the time I graduate (which I was on the right track) my hair would be my desired length and I'd wear it from then on without the add ins . Now that's changed. I'm going to consult with my beautician first but I'm pretty sure I'll keep the same pattern with making gradual cuts to my hair until the perm is totally gone. And I'm glad, because I have no time, patience, or desire to rock a mini fro. (Just not my style.)
Any who, I guess I'm coming to the end to this introductory blog. My goal is to have at least 2 blog posts a month but hopefully I'll be closer to 3 or 5. I hope to gain followers for the sole purpose of showing the world what a true example of a Godly woman is. There are too many examples of what NOT to do and hardly any examples of what should be. I desire to let women, men, whoever know that it is okay to be in a totally committed, on fire, relationship with Christ. I desire to be transparent in my downfalls and share whatever God is teaching me in my life at that moment. Most importantly, I desire to be a true woman after God's own heart.
Until next time,
Camille4Christ
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